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It Can’t be Worse than That One Time

After 8.5 months of budget traveling, my bar has dropped for, well, everything. I choose the cheapest option for everything I do in each corner of the world, an unsurprisingly that doesn’t always lead to a great experience. It does, however, sometimes lead to a great story. Most notably, it effectively eliminates any urge I have to complain about any future situation even slightly better.

Here are a few of the experiences from around the world that set my bar:


Accomodation


Split, Croatia

After booking the cheapest hostel in town, we waited twenty minutes for a sweaty front desk guy to show up, take off his shirt, and proceed to double the bed price by charging for sheets and random fees. This was immediately after another guest warned us to check that the bed wouldn’t collapse before climbing into it.

No.

So at 10pm we are traipsing through the city, exhausted from exploring a national park all day, to find that hostel option #2 had bed bugs. More walking to hostel #3, which was full, and finally to our fourth attempt which finally gave us a place to sleep, much to the disappointment of a French couple that were getting ready for sexy time when we crashed the party.


Acona, Italy

I had three options when I booked an overnight ferry from Split, Croatia to Acona, Italy. Private room (expensive), reserved seat (okay), or “deck space” (cheapest).

Naturally, I chose deck space, and was prepared to sleep under the stars.

It turns out deck space means anywhere in the restaurants, which are closed down for the night. People that knew this arrived early to claim booths - people that didn’t (me) spread themselves out on the dirty carpeted restaurant floor and slept spread out over their belongings, listening to the sound of a ferry engine all night.


Food


Burma, Myanmar

After a long, hot day of temple exploration we stopped at a restaurant for food. It was fancier than intended, and came with a free dessert tray.

Now, I love dessert.

And I can tell you that this was NOT dessert.

It was positively the worst assortment of dried fruits I have ever tasted, along with some abomination that was supposedly identified as popcorn.

Not great.


Brasov, Romania

Looking at a map, I guessed that the train from Brasov to Cluj-Napoca would take about two hours. Unfortunately, I did not take Romanian train speeds into account and the train actually took 8 hours. None of the stops were long enough to buy food, so for lunch and dinner I ate pumpkin seeds.

In one day I developed a fear of starvation.


Cluj-Napoca, Romania

One evening when I wasn’t feeling well, I went to the store to buy a can of chicken noodle soup. Nothing was in English, but the picture looked right so I brought it back to the Hostel and cooked it.

After I took one bite I realized I had made a mistake. Cow stomach soup was a popular traditional meal in this region.

Nice cultural experience, but not when I was feeling sick in the first place.

Experiences


Da Nang, Vietnam

One of my favorite things to do in foreign countries is go to the movies. In Asia it is extremely cheap, and the commercials are so different. In Thailand before a movie you must stand for the king!

When I went to see the Grinch, however, there was a miscommunication and I spent the next two hours watching this movie in Vietnamese.


Yangon, Myanmar

I boarded a local ferry to explore the village of Dala on my first day in Myanmar. Once I was on the ferry, it became clear that this wasn’t a route popular with tourists - I was the only white person, and certainly the only blonde person. It also became abundantly clear that this was one of those countries where you cover your knees.

My bad.

So now I am sitting there, all eyes on me, a newly deputized ferry hoe with not much I could do about it.


Ha Giang, Vietnam

After crashing my motorbike in Ha Giang, Vietnam, I was considerably shaken up. My speed dropped dramatically and I was trying my best to pull myself together emotionally. As I continued down the road, I saw that water buffalo were being herded down the road (normal). I dropped my speed to second gear and slowly cruised past — when one buffalo suddenly dropped his horns and charged STRAIGHT into the side of my bike. My bike teetered towards the ditch, my leg was jammed between a massive animal and the side of my motorcycle, and I was accelerating the bike forward with uncertainty.

The village girls put their hands over their mouths in surprise; our buffalo just attacked that tourist!

(I escaped with minor bruising.)


These ”alternative” experiences wouldn’t have been my first choice, but they sure make me feel lucky when things turn out great.

And even when the situation isn’t great - at least it’s better than that one time.

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